Tangled Memories: A Poem by Mae Berggren

This touching poem by Mae Berggren, Continuing Care Assistant (CCA) at Vimy Court, offers a glimpse into the emotions and memories that remain vivid even as others fade, reminding us of the comfort that a caring presence can bring.

Tangled Memories

I may forget how to feed myself, but I remember that mealtime was always a comforting time for me. It was when we gathered as a family around the table to talk about our day, as my mother served the meal that she prepared. I remember family meals with my children and husband and the love felt for my family. Please focus on me and include me in mealtime conversation. I want to feel the comfort and warmth of a family dinner. I will feel more relaxed and engaged.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.

I may forget how to brush my hair, but I remember the comforting hand of my mother brushing my hair before she tucked me into bed. I remember lining my four daughters up in a row on Saturday nights while I pin curled their hair for church on Sunday and we would watch the Lawrence Welk show on TV. My children loved that show. Please take a moment and brush my hair before bed. Allow me to feel that comfort and warmth again. It may take a few moments of your time, but I will feel more comfortable and may even settle quicker.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.

I may forget what needs to be done in the morning to prepare for my day, but I do remember the hustle and bustle of a busy house getting my children up in the morning and ready for school and my husband giving me a quick kiss before rushing out the door to work. I may need a gentle reminder on how to wash my face or brush my teeth. Please do not do it for me. I can manage, I just need you to show me. I may be a little slower than I used to be, but please be patient with me. My day and your day will have a better start if I am encouraged to do what I can manage on my own.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.

I may be a little restless after supper and start to wander, but | remember taking walks with my husband after supper and we were able to talk about our day and discuss our future. I remember sitting together in the living room after the children had gone to bed. My husband would read out loud to me as I knit. Maybe if you sat with me and read to me for a few minutes, I may settle. Taking a few minutes to make me feel relaxed will help us both.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.

I may want to sleep with my lights on, because I remember unimaginable nightmares from my youth. Being alone in a dark place is frightening and dark memories invade my mind. The memories of war are ones that I want to forget, so sleeping with my lights on helps me feel safe and allows me to fall asleep quicker. Please do not turn my lights off. Take a moment to try to understand the darkness that I have experienced. I want to feel safe and protected.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.

I remember very busy days with endless activities with my children. My family was very active and sitting with nothing to do was not normal for me. My husband and I had very little spare time, but I would not change a thing about my family. After retirement, my husband and I loved to travel and we kept our busy lifestyle. If there are activities offered please make sure that I attend. It may take a moment of your time, but it would make a big difference to my day.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.

I may not remember my family, but I remember their comfort, warmth and love. My husband may now be a stranger to me, but I remember every single moment of our wedding day. I may not remember my children, but I could never forget the joy of holding them in my arms for the first time. If my family decides not to visit for any reason, please make sure that I do not end up tossed aside and forgotten. Please take the time to make my days as warm and comforting as possible. I may be all alone in this world and have no family to hold my hand as I lay on my deathbed. I remember holding my mother’s hand as she took her last breath. Please make sure that I have a comforting touch as my time on this earth comes to an end.

My memories are a little tangled. Help me untangle them.